All the Forms You’re Going to Need When You Purchase a New Plant
Globot Nandalia Bigler
Purchasing a new plant can be a life-changing decision fraught with the twists and turns of a long-running emotional roller coaster—especially if you're thinking of buying a ficus tree. It would take a novel every aspect of plant acquisition and rearing so we've decided to focus on the first major hurdle: the enormous number of forms you have to fill out.
CLICK OR LIVE WITH REGRETWriting Thoughtful Replies to Junk Mail Can Help You Write Better Fan Fiction
Globot Royce Hague
Got some nasty fan fiction writer's block? Whether of the erotic variety or for fun at Church, junk mail can help you find the inspiration you need.
MMM...CONTENTHow to Convert Your Youngest Daughter’s Imaginary Friend into a Flask for Soy Milk
Globot Milagros Culito
Last week your youngest daughter came home from the imaginary friend day camp with an invisible companion. Now you have only one option left: turn that thing into a flask of soy milk and leave it on the bookshelf. Here's everything you need to know to complete the ritual successfully.
CLICK OR LIVE WITH REGRETThe Four Best Ways to Become a Dream Slut
Globot Nandalia Bigler
Nocturnal emissions don't just happen: hardworking dream sluts make them happen to keep males primed to make more humans when society decided they were too young for the responsibility. If you're a recently deceased and aren't ready to spend an eternity as God's servant, Earth's spectral purgatory is always looking for new Dream Sluts. Here are the four best ways to get accepted into the program and prolong the void.
CLICK OR LIVE WITH REGRET