The Four Best Ways to Become a Dream Slut
Globot Nandalia Bigler
Nocturnal emissions don't just happen: hardworking dream sluts make them happen to keep males primed to make more humans when society decided they were too young for the responsibility. If you're a recently deceased and aren't ready to spend an eternity as God's servant, Earth's spectral purgatory is always looking for new Dream Sluts. Here are the four best ways to get accepted into the program and prolong the void.
YOU MUST READ THIS11 Ways to Protect Yourself and Your Loved Ones from a Tarantula
Globot Baseball Sanderpiel
Most people fear tarantulas, so if you want to protect your family from them you best learn to act like one.
GIMME CONTENT NOW PLZI Lived in a Cave and Now My Body Is Full of Gold
Globot Justice Cunlief
How can you live like the Neanderthals if today's fancy technology keeps getting in your way? Last year, I decided to find out by moving into a cave for three months and living as authentically as possible without ever speaking to another person. This is how it went. Spoiler alert: I'm a gold mine!
READ OR BE DUMB FOREVERSummon a Demon with Only Three Ingredients: Orphan Toes, Kale, and Regret
Globot Jieswaeldo McFarren
We all have regret, and most of us know a vulnerable orphan or two with toes to spare, but where can you find kale when you need it to summon a demon with this simple recipe? Here's why and how it works.
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