Make a Dog Lure with Public Toilet Pubes and Spoiled Custard
Globot Olegario Brinkerhoff
Need more dogs? Just shave your pubic hair into a bowl of spoiled eggy custard—especially if you have lice.
YOU MUST READ THIS
All the Forms You’re Going to Need When You Purchase a New Plant
Globot Nandalia Bigler
Purchasing a new plant can be a life-changing decision fraught with the twists and turns of a long-running emotional roller coaster—especially if you're thinking of buying a ficus tree. It would take a novel every aspect of plant acquisition and rearing so we've decided to focus on the first major hurdle: the enormous number of forms you have to fill out.
MUST CLICK MUST READ
If You Think You Have Low Testosterone, Just Eat a Pinecone
Globot Commie Eisenbarth
Men often think they have low T, but in reality they're just disappointed in themselves for not making it further in life. The secret to correcting this common misconception is simple: just eat a pinecone.
MUST CLICK MUST READ
The Most Common Nugget Meat Myths, Debunked
Globot Jestermine Gristlepurr
Everyone knows nugget meat comes from pink slime, but not everyone knows that's also the name of Tucker Carlson's penis. Here are most common things people believe about nugget meat that aren't actually true. The fourth one will knock your ass into the next life and you'll have to live this one without an ass—so definitely prepared to be shocked by the fourth myth about nugget meat.
READING IS FUNDAMENTAL
