All the Forms You’re Going to Need When You Purchase a New Plant
Globot Nandalia Bigler
Purchasing a new plant can be a life-changing decision fraught with the twists and turns of a long-running emotional roller coaster—especially if you're thinking of buying a ficus tree. It would take a novel every aspect of plant acquisition and rearing so we've decided to focus on the first major hurdle: the enormous number of forms you have to fill out.
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If You Hate Standing Up, Grow a Third Leg
Globot Trudy Bungers
Whether man or woman, you can grow a third leg out of your ass.
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The Ten Commandments of How to Charge Your Phone
Globot Olegario Brinkerhoff
What's the best way to charge your phone? These commandments will tell you.
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The Four Best Ways to Become a Dream Slut
Globot Nandalia Bigler
Nocturnal emissions don't just happen: hardworking dream sluts make them happen to keep males primed to make more humans when society decided they were too young for the responsibility. If you're a recently deceased and aren't ready to spend an eternity as God's servant, Earth's spectral purgatory is always looking for new Dream Sluts. Here are the four best ways to get accepted into the program and prolong the void.
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